I can't stand this guy

Check out this excerpt from Chris Low's (ESPN) interview with every Falcon fan's favorite guy, Bobby Petrino (with my comments added):

How much do you think your image has been tarnished by the way you left the Atlanta Falcons before the season was over, and is that something you've spent much time thinking about?

BP: I feel like my image is important. There's no question about that. (That's a little strong...is there really NO question? - sg) I've worked hard at it in the state of Arkansas and the people that are important to the University of Arkansas. I certainly feel like the situation in Atlanta and all the criticism afterward ... that some of the criticism was warranted. (Really, Bobby? You think SOME criticism of a man who backstabs a man who is bending over backwards to be good to him, and then sneaks away in the dead of night because he's too much of a coward to face the men who have sweat and bled for him...you think SOME criticism of such a man is warranted? - sg)The timing of the whole deal was something you don't wish on anybody. (I love this...this wasn't WISHED on you Bobby, it was a situation YOU CREATED! - sg) But the people that know me and the people that take the time to get to know me understand where I'm coming from. (This one's too easy...since when do you stay in one place long enough for anybody to "take the time" to get to know you, Bobby? - sg)

If you could have done one thing different about your exit in Atlanta, would it have been telling the players personally and not leaving notes for them on their lockers?

BP: Yes, absolutely ... if you could have. But there was just no way. It was a situation where you couldn't do it. There was no way to have it work out that way and still have it work out here. (Sorry, but this is a big steaming pile. Does he really expect us to believe that if he stayed with the Falcons ONE MORE DAY, just long enough to man up and face his players in person, that Arkansas would decide to go another direction? Bull stinky. - sg)

Many of your players over the years have said your coaching approach is more business-like and no-nonsense. How much has that changed over the years?

BP: A big part of coaching in college is to get young kids in here at 17 and 18 years old and help them grow up and be able to face what's in front of them when they're done playing. We do approach the game as a business. We do approach our practice and all of our meetings that way, but I've certainly had a lot of players walk through that (office) door with things bothering them. That's one of the fun things about college coaching, all the different things that come up. (I shudder to contemplate my child going to this scumbag for advice. Also...young people come to your door with problems, and that's "fun" for you? What kind of psycopath is this guy? - sg)

Do you think you're a better communicator than you've been painted to be?

BP: I don't know how I've been painted, but I think I'm a good communicator. I think I communicate real well. (OK, first of all..."real well?" Is that irony, including a grammatical error while discussing how well you communicate? I always get confused about what irony is...hold on, let me ask Alanis...
Second of all, EVERYBODY who I have heard talk about this guy says he's a HORRIBLE communicator. Really, that's what counts...if you are a good communicator, someone other than you will think so. - sg)

How many prospects' homes have you gone into where they quizzed you about the Falcons' situation?

BP: I'd guess probably just about everybody I recruited last year asked me about it. It came up continually, but they felt good about the way it was answered. We had a great recruiting class. I'm very fired up about the freshmen we have. Unfortunately, a lot of them are going to be playing. But it's a great class to build around. (Let me rephrase for ya, coach: "Everywhere I go, people want to know if I'm as big a scumbag as they've heard. I was able to squirm around the answer well enough to convince a lot of them that I'm only about HALF as big scumbag as they had heard...luckily, most of my recruits and their parents aren't real bright, ya know? So we got a lot of suckers coming in...I need to go ahead and play them this year, because who knows if I'll even see their sophomore year? Whoever the next guy is is sure going to have some talented, although kind of gullible, guys, I'll tell you that! WHOOOOOOO!!! PIG!!! Ummmm...what's the next part again?" - sg)

When you're going to play as many freshmen as you are this year, what's critical?

BP: That as a coaching staff we're patient and don't ask them to do too much and everybody understands that we have to get better each week in practice. I've always believed that winning is the end result of doing everything right in practice. (Actual answer...trying not to get too attached to them, since I'll likely only know them for a year or so. That way when I quit on them via laminated ditto paper, it might not tick them off as bad, ya know what I'm sayin'? - sg)

Don't you think your interviewing for the Auburn head job while Tommy Tuberville was still the head coach (in 2003) also factors into that image of you being a nomad?

BP: Yes, it probably does. But the only thing I can do anything about now is what happens from here. (Yes, the fact that you backstabbed yet another fellow professional is nothing you can change now...we just have to wait and see who the next victim is, don't we? - sg)