Dwight's perfect crime

I'll post full thoughts on The Office from last night later, but this was too good to wait...Dwight's description of his "perfect crime":

I break in to Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the
chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down a woman catches me. She tells
me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love
all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I
tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I
like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard: I have a son, and it's the
chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to
meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years.
She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin.
That's where I stashed the chandelier.

UPDATE: Now with VIDEO!!!